Fatherhood celebrated at inaugural lunch

“The most unpublicized program in the county,” is what Rodrick Caldwell calls it. As the coordinator for the Coffee County Family Service’s Fatherhood Initiative, he is set on changing that.

“I’ve raised six kids. I’ve made some mistakes. I’m the youth pastor at my church,” Caldwell explained. “So anything that is about making things better for the children, I’m all about that—every time.”

The Fatherhood Initiative is a nationwide program that has been in existence since March 7, 1994. The first grant for the program to Coffee County Family Services was received in 2010 in the amount of $35,000. “Since that time, we have graduated over 1,200 men,” Caldwell said.

There is no charge for participants to attend the six-week course. “We feed them every Wednesday night they are here,” Caldwell said. “The fellowship is great.”

Alfred Townsend is the instructor for the local study which centers around the “24-7 Dad Curriculum” study guide. Topics during the six-week, once weekly meetings include showing and handling personal feelings, men’s health, effective communication, a father’s role, discipline, working with the children’s mother and co-parenting and building healthy relationships with family and community. “That means that if you come in on the third class, someone in the class who started earlier may graduate three weeks before you do. I keep the program rolling. We don’t have a lull and no one has to wait to start,” Caldwell said. “The program centers around the book but is flexible because if someone has an issue they want to discuss we focus on that. Some of the most awesome conversations happen in this place.”

“Ninety percent of our clients gain something from the program—whether it be job placement, job training, better relationships with their children and/or the child’s mother or motivation to do the right thing for the children,” Caldwell said. “The program offers scholarships for Eye Care Assistant, Dental Assistant, Pharmacy Technician and CDL certifications for fathers—and mothers in our program.

“Yes, there is a corresponding curriculum for mothers called ‘Understanding Dad’ and they have access to the same scholarship offers,” he added. “We assist with anything that will empower fathers and or mothers to be the best they can be.”

Caldwell said that some of the program’s participants are court-ordered to attend, some are referred by the Department of Human Resources.

“One thing that I have tried to insure is that participation in this program should not be viewed as a punishment,” Caldwell said. “It shouldn’t be a ‘punishment’ to learn how to be a better father. If they feel like they are being made to come, that throws the class off a little bit. Sometimes when they come here, they are mad in the beginning but after about 30 minutes, they throw that off.

A first-ever Fatherhood Initiative Celebration Lunch was held at Panache Events in Enterprise May 7. The event was co-sponsored by the Phi Beta Sigma, Alpha Chi Sigma Dothan Chapter and Chapter resident Gene Duplantier. At that lunch, Josh Black was named as CCFSC Fatherhood Initiative Program Father of the Year. “He first came to me and said, ‘I need help getting my children. I love my children and I want to be a father to them,’” Caldwell said. “It touched my heart. Josh never missed a Wednesday meeting. This man stuck with it.”

“I appreciate everything you do from the bottom of my heart,” Black, surrounded by three little girls, told those attending the lunch ceremony.

“I honor you as fathers and I love watching you with your kids today,” Coffee County Family Services Executive Director Judy Crowley told those attending the CCFSC Fatherhood Initiative lunch May 7. “Keep on doing what you are doing, but do it better tomorrow than you did today. Always strive to be the better example.”

Elba’s Harris Temple Church of God in Christ Superintendent William K. Ellison stressed to those attending the lunch the importance of a father’s validation. “A lot of children do not receive a father’s validation so they grow up looking for something or someone to receive approval from,” Ellison said. “I encourage every father that’s out there to let your child know that you approve of them. That way they won’t go searching for approval from anybody else.”

Enterprise City Schools Superintendent Dr. Zell Thomas commended those present on their participation in the Fatherhood Initiative Program. “Everybody always says being a daddy is important for the sons, I feel it’s even more important to be there for our daughters. We have to set the example by how we treat our wives or their mothers as to how they should be treated. We set that parameter.

“As fathers, we do our best, we sacrifice for the greater good of the family, that’s our role,” Thomas said. “We’re the protector. God is always looking out for us, we just have to do our part.”

Ashford’s Oaky Grove Missionary Baptist Church Pastor Chris Flowers shared his personal journey through the successes and failures of life and life lessons learned.

“Number 1 is the power of forgiveness,” Flowers said. “Number 2 is that I learned that the only parent that I was responsible for was me. God is holding me accountable. Number 3 is that as a father, you’ve got to show up.

“Showing up up looks different for different situations. For me. it was showing up at the kids’ basketball games, at the PTA meetings. Fathers, if you have daughters, you be the first man she falls in love with,” Flowers said. “I learned that God’s grace has a way of healing all wounds.

“They don’t give you the manual that says how to be the perfect father. With God’s grace and mercy, yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not even here. All we have is today. Love your children. They are going to grow up before you know it.”

“When you’ve made so many mistakes at being a father, God uses your mess to make a ministry out of it,” Caldwell said. “Each day is another day to get it right.

“No matter how bad they might look, don’t give up on what you know is right,” Caldwell stressed. “There are so many opportunities to screw it up and do it wrong but if you know what’s right, stand on that even if it causes issues. You have to stand on what’s right.

“This is the most unpublicized program in the whole county,” Caldwell said. “We take care of the man from top to bottom. It’s not all done at our CCFSC building. It’s this community helps gets things done. It’s a partnership with the community employers and organizations. They are the ones that help this program grow.”